May 2013
81 posts
store guy: /extensively stares at boobs
me: yes, hello, i'm here because my mobile's not working. also if you could please stop looking at my breasts?
store guy: oh my god i wasn't looking at your breasts! - i mean, that, too, but... /slowly unbuttons shirt
me: ... why are you taking your shirt off now
store guy: /dramatically opens shirt to reveal iron man tee
me: /looks down at her captain america tee
store guy: /happy seal-clapping
me: oh my god we match
store guy: if we can't repair your phone, you can be damn sure we'll avenge it!
f-e-a-r—-n-o-t:
Having sex is very nice. But you it having sex is also very nice, because you can cuddle on the couch and touch skin and kiss but you don’t have to crawl in their pants. Sometimes it’s nice to not have any expectations placed on you.
cieliiito:
How am I two decades old and still this fucking awkward, I want a refund.
Yes.
vidyagameher:
I don’t have the attention span for job sites that have 12092923930393 lines of information for you to fill out. Damn bitch lemme submit my resume and fuck off with that shit.
f-e-a-r—-n-o-t:
whorville:
I have bullshitted my way through almost two decades of life
Im like 2 months away from two decades
2 decades 2 years -_-
Reblog if you're over 10 and you still have...
danny-u-idjit:
-JSC
they were spaceships.: briliantlyfreakish:... →
briliantlyfreakish:
disgustinghuman:
shout out to those with complex relationships with their mothers being bombarded today with messages about how everyone should/has to love their mom, that your mom should be your best friend, basically being forced into celebrating/acknowledging…
The best way to get a girls attention.
laugh-addict:
Not this:
But this:
phosphorescentt:
this might be difficult to hear, but, not eating McDonald’s doesn’t actually make you better than anyone else.
sofiaauditores:
“you are a girl you shouldnt like that video game”
imjust-kyian:
scroturn:
i get really offended when someone doesnt sit next to me but im also relieved they didnt sit next to me
this is the most accurate thing i’ve ever read
The blog of A really really lame girl:... →
mindfitness-soul:
meowrailsprite:
animatedcatastrophe:
I JUST GOOGLED WHAT CAUSES PERIOD PAINS AND APPARENTLY IT’S BECAUSE THE UTERUS CONTRACTS AND THAT CUTS OFF THE FUCKING BLOOD SUPPLY
PEOPLE WITH PERIOD PAINS ARE LITERALLY FEELING THEIR UTERUS TRYING TO KILL ITSELF
hello…
blissfulparadox:
Ten years from now, you’ll be walking with your kid through the city and you’ll pass someone who smells just like me. The memories will suddenly flash through your mind, and you’ll turn around to look for me. I won’t be there, but you’ll reminisce for a moment about the good times we had. Then after a few minutes, you’ll forget about me again until the next time the wind catches...
altairs-butt:
wanting 2 talk 2 someone but having nothing 2 say
So who here is attracted to a fictional character?
f-e-a-r—-n-o-t:
everythingbutharleyquinn:
playing-the-angel:
j-ackrabbit:
j-ackrabbit:
OMG THE NOTES FJDSKALFDSAF GUYS WHOA
being attracted to fictional characters is the extent of my sex life.
Rory Pond
cryingvagina:
i am the uneven drawstring on the hoodie of life
gameandwatch:
you ever see someone attractive but they’re such a stereotypical type of attractive that it’s actually boring